I thought I would start up my blog again - a few times a
month at least! Writing has always been such a relaxing thing for me. My mind
is always 100 mph that when I sit down and get it all down I feel so liberated.
I started
this blog about 3 years ago after my friend Thomas died - it was my outlet when
Matt & I were grieving. I have to cover my eyes looking at some of my old
posts. I was in a different place in my life & it's like when you hear your
voice on a recorder and you think, "How in the heck do I have
friends?!"
After a
death-breakup-tragic life event, sometimes you feel like you'll forever be in
that Eeyore stage of life. You feel peeved that the sun could even shine that
bright or how dare those damn birds chirp so cheerfully when you feel like
getting out of bed is the biggest obstacle you'd ever face. I've been there - we eventually learn we can
get out of bed - we learn we can smile - we learn we can be genuinely happy.
Our loved one would want it anyways. It took a lot of dark nights for Matt
& I but I can say we have finally reached a point where we can smile and we
know it's legitimate.
I'm taking
a Christianity class (we have to take it to graduate) and we visited the
monastery in Watertown. We were invited for prayer, supper, and then to discuss
a time of suffering in our lives. Our class sat in a circle and one of the nuns
started off by telling us about her upbringing and how her mother passed away
when she was only 11. I lost it. I felt those same feelings of anger, sadness,
grief, etc. she talked about after Thomas and my grandma were gone. My classmates
went around and when it got to me it took everything I had to share my story.
It was a revelation for me. I honestly felt so much healing in sharing my FULL
story to 23 other people.
I felt I
had to be strong for Matt for a lot of years. I think a lot of people
overlooked that fact. I never got to grieve in the way I needed to. The next
day after sharing my story, I quit my job. I decided I was tired of being
treated a certain way & I was ready for a change. I will leave the story at
that besides the fact that life is too short to go home miserable every day.
I didn't
really have much of a plan. Little did I know how much Mary Kay would change my
life. The women I've met have been the most incredible people. They really are
the type that think that I can do anything! They motivate me to want to do and
be my best. I get to have fun and help people! I actually believe in this
company, their products, and love nothing more than helping my customers! I
could cry I am so happy. I wake up and get to see all the smiles my kids go
through in a day. Archer is getting smarter and funnier everyday - I get to
witness it!
I am quite
the skeptic, the pessimist, whatever you'd like to call it! I come from 2 sets
of parents. One set wants me to follow my heart and do what makes me happy. The
other set takes more convincing. They want me to work at a job thats M-F and
has great health benefits with a 401K plan that is matched! (I am sure they
want me to be happy too! haha!) I think this is why God knew I needed both sets
of 'rents - I need balance in my life! I turned down a job of $17/hr. to pursue
a career I knew WILL pay me more and will feed my soul with the nourishment it
needs to lead a happy life. (cheezy but true)
I used to
think, "not all of us can work from home. we HAVE TO get up and work 8-5
at a traditional job. that's LIFE!" but no, it's really not. I have
friends who love their traditional jobs! I am happy for them! It's a rarity. Whatever
path you choose in life - make it a happy one.
If you're
not happy, remember that YOU are the only person who can change YOUR situation.
We are the only people who put ourselves in this box of, "I can't" or
"I can" - I come across so many women who would be great at doing
what I do BUT they can't see their own potential! They make excuses about how
they're too busy, they aren't sales people, they don't wear makeup, etc.
But I see
it in them. Busy people know how to get sh*t done - right?! They prioritize
better than anyone. They use time wisely. As for not being a sales person - do
you think that's what I am?! I run and hide at those mall kiosks or car places.
I simply just talk to women about stuff I believe in & we have fun! Done.
Not pushy in the slightest. Don't wear makeup? That's ok! I know a lot of women
grew up with mothers who didn't teach them (mine didn't! they stressed skincare
but not makeup!) If you're teachable, I can help you out GF. I am so happy - I
want that for you too.
I had this saying in my old office, "Happy girls are the prettiest." It's now sitting on my kitchen table (cause it's my office right now) and I truly believe that phrase! GET HAPPY GIRL!
Anyways, I
hope you enjoyed reading - I will doing personal/makeup/wedding updates. I hope
you have a happy Monday & don't hesitate to reach out if you're grieving,
want to know more, or simply just benefited from reading. I LOVE all ya'll!
XO
(Items used in this look: MK Miracle set dry/normal, MK CC cream light/medium, MK mineral foundation beige .5, MK blush in copper glow, MK eyeshadows in spun silk, chocolate kiss, hazelnut, MK ultimate mascara, MK true dimensions lipstick in Sheer Blush, MK nourishine lipgloss in icicle -----> www.marykay.com/bcarpenter2983 )
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